Sunday, April 24, 2016

Helping Your Loved One When They Are Very Confused

Today, I had a nice day with grandma. We played basketball!  Things were going well until grandma got confused.  She thought my dad was her husband.  My father told grandma that he is not her husband but he is married to my mom. ( I would not have done that!). Then grandma asked us where her husband is located.  She seemed upset and worried.(My grandpa died in 2008.)  I did NOT tell her the TRUTH.  That would be the worst thing!  Instead, I said, that grandpa is at work, he will see her later. Grandma immediately calmed down.  My grandpa used to work very long hours. He owned a liquor store in the Village in NYC.  Grandma was used to grandpa working long hours. It was a memory that was strong in her brain.  If we told her the truth, she would have been so sad!  She really loved grandpa and she probably would start to cry.  Then she may forget what we tell her, and then we would have to keep reminding her that her beloved husband was dead, over and over and over again. It was much better to just tell her that he is "working and will be home soon."  She smiled after we told her, and the rest of the afternoon was nice!


1. Remember to always think with your heart.
2. Protect your loved one from pain from "too much truth"
3. Go into the world of Alzheimer's disease, don't force the loved one into your world.

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